Naruto: Revealed
by NinjaKana
Summary: Discontinued.OLD. Author dropped this. Dislikes
1. The Characters

**Naruto: Revealed **

**Disclaimer: Don't own the show or manga (which I haven't read) or anything else to do with Naruto, just my opinions and imagination.**

**I know this has been done thousands of times before! But this is _MY_ way of doing this! I will TRY to keep them in character, but it will mould to my like of shonen ai, somewhat. So yeah… This chapter I'm listing characters taking part (of free will and of whom I've captured) in this show or article (Vote: Should it be T.V Show style or Magazine Column style?).**

_Italics are the letters_

**Bold and underlined will be names before they talk**

**Bold is yelling**

This is normal conversation

Just underlined is when I am referring to a character

* * *

The People to Ask: 

Naruto- Of corse he came! He came on his own free will, but made sure we had unlimited ramen bars…

Sasuke- I fought him, won, tied him up and dragged him here… Okay, well I paid stalker fan girls in Sasuke accessories, he was asleep and they tied him up and dragged him here.

Sakura- She came as soon as I told her Sasuke was gonna be here… She offered to bring him… (but the fan girls beat her)

Ino- Same reason as Sakura…

Shikamaru- Much convincing and promise of games of Shogi and Go inbetween segments

Chouji- Liked the unlimited ramen bar and wanted team InoShikaCho to be complete

Hinata- She just nodded and turned red when Naruto walked over asking if I could get Miso Ramen for him

Kiba- Came with Akamaru obviously. I just said pretty please and he came(I think its cause some people are here that he may like…)

Shino- Just shrugged and came…

Neji- I told him it was his destiny, he called my bluff, so I tackled him to the ground and told him (omg he blushed a bit!…I think…) to come and he did.

Tenten- Said she had nothing better to do

Rock Lee- HE BLOODY STALKED ME! HE WOULDNT LEAVE ME ALONE! TT Then he said that he would bring youth to this thing, so I didnt object cause Lee scares me…

Gai- HE WAS STALKING ME WITH LEE!! TT PLEASE HELP ME GET RID OF HIM!!!!!!! (and lee)

Kakashi- I stealed his porno J

Iruka- I asked nicely

The Sand Sibs- I -gulp- I hugged Gaara… and they just came after that. I'm pretty sure Gaara-kun wants to kill me (wait did he blush too?)… but Temari and Kankuro seem impressed…

Itachi- Ugh. This was the doing of my evil side… I don't know what happened, but he's scared of me whenever I touch my shoe… and he keeps … smiling (nervously) when I look at him.

Orochimaru- He stalked Sasuke… then started eying the food… My evil side hit him (she told me) and pretty much scared him, **-so I can tell him to leave if I want, but I want him to suffer… -**DAMMIT! YAMI!!!! STOP THAT!

Kabuto- Came with orochimaru

Deidara- **-I asked him to come. I will assasinate you and take your place in akat-** YAMI!!!! NO MORE!!!!!

Kisame- Yami threated him, and said sushi at some point… I'm usually not conscious when she takes over…

* * *

FYI **-Stuff written here in bold-,** Yeah thats Yami (my evil side)... and -stuff here normal text- is an action... 

Uhhhh….. that's all I can think of now… ask for someone and I MIGHT add them… So review with your questions! I will update as soon as possible! I will remove parts of your questions or modify (check grammar and spelling, $#&-ify swear words) if it is too long or inappropriate. Chances are I'll only grammar and spell check. So………

REVIEW!!!!!


	2. First Letter!

**I don't own anything, just my imagination and the art supplies I confiscated from Deidara. Writing structre is the same as last chapter with the following added:**

**'typed stuff is thinking.'**

**A/N: Only one review so far? Well it's kind of a odd one here…**

**So on with the show/ Article (No-body voted yet!)**

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_Bloo Tara Rain Ribbon Wrote:_

_Sasuke and Itachi, why does the Uchiha clan symbol look like a pokeball? _

_Sasuke if you want to revive your clan why don't you date a girl?_

_Deidara, Would you marry me? _

_I think Sakura and Sasuke would make a cute couple to revive the Uchiha clan._

_I send 'Diedara-kun' a cookie. And miss NinjaKana, would you please put me in the fic as Deidara's girlfriend?_

_( Letter has been changed slightly so it makes a bit more literary sense and isn't jumbled together)_

_XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx_

**NinjaKana:** Well, there is the letter. Lets answer in order; so Sasuke, Itachi?

**Itachi:** It's a fan… not a 'pokeball' or whatever your calling it… and I mean a paper fan, not a crazy stalker fan… although some of them can bake fairly well -sees NinjaKana tieing shoe and freezes still-

**Sasuke:** Uchiha is another pronunciation of Uchiwa, which means paper fan, and the whole thing is just a cruel joke at twisting my name. I don't want to date sakura because,well, she is practically psyco! Also as a teenage boy, violent video games are way cool, and Hello! Earth to person who wrote in! I'm trying to kill that bastard -struggles against precautionary restraints to point to Itachi - Over there because he killed my whole family!!! Do you really think that leaves enough time for me to date a girl?!?!

**Naruto:** But Sasuke still have some time when he isn't doing those things but he is…busy with other issues. -smirks, causing the younger Uchiha to blush ever so slightly-

**Deidara:** Listen, I don't know you, why I'm on this show or why I'm scared of some little red-haired girl who looks only about 90lbs., hn! I really have no idea whats going on, hn, but being trapped here and missing my work at the Akatsuki cannot be good, hn! Thanks for the cookie, hn, but I would have like clay a bit more… art is my passion! Hn. They don't let me have any art supplies here…

**Kiba: ****THAT'S BECAUSE YOUR CRAZY AND TRIED TO BLOW US ALL UP WITH THAT LITTLE PIECE OF PLASTERSCENE YOU FOUND UNDER THE CHAIR!!!!!!**

**Rock Lee: **Yes! If Gai-sensei and I had been a foot or two closer we would have gotten hurt!

**NinjaKana: '**If only the blast had knocked them out or unconscious….' Sorry I can't put you in the fic as Deidara's girlfriend. This is all about the Naruto characters and their hostesses (sadly yami and I) But feel free to drop by again with another letter for Deidara!

Sooooo…. That's the only letter… What do we do now?

-Everyone looks bored, except Shikamaru, he looks asleep. Some people look pretty mad too… Like Orochimaru and Kabuto all tied up in the corner away from all the 'normal people'

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**That's all for now! If you want more click the button that says 'Review' And leave someone a message!!!!!**

**Oh I'm gonna just type Kana from now on, its easier and Shikamaru has convinced me its less troublesome' to use the short version. Yami might just have her own underlined name thing when she butts in, but I don't know. Depends on how lazy she is…**

**Ja-ne! -goes and plays Shogi with Shikamaru-**

**REVIEW!!!!!**


	3. Sasuke's Nightime Secret

**A/N: OH WOW! Many reviews!! (okay well 3 is many to me, but) Thanks sooo much!**

**I don't own anything…**

**I was originally gonna do my other fics today, but I wanted to update this one first! So yeah. **

**Lets get going… And pardon these people for being rude but Yami seems to be taunting them when I sleep… I might need Tsunade or someone to help with that…**

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_Tru-viet wrote:_

_Hmm, great fic so far!  
Tenten, what interested you into becoming a weapons user? Was it to impress Neji? I know you like him! And of course he likes you too! Don't worry, I got your back lol. Itachi...is it true that you were drunk and thought the Uchiha clan were a bunch of evil alien squirrels?!_

**Tenten:** Ummm…. Well, I just kinda liked the way people used weapons in the fighting video games, and with Neji and his awesome Byakugan and just plain being a genius, I didn't think I had to focus on Ninjutsu, Genjutsu and all that type of stuff. So I decided why not be a weapons master. Uhhh… Before I answer the next thing… Kana-chan.. Can you cover Neji's ears or something?

**Kana:** Sure… -unties Neji-

**Neji:** Freedom! It was my destiny to be fre- -tackled by Kana- Well, shit…

**Kana: **-smiles- Lets go… -slaps a just seal to prevent Neji from harming anyone- In there… Oh wait -puts earplugs in now tied up Neji's ears and locks him in a sound-proof room- Go ahead Tenten!

**Tenten: ****OF COURSE!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!1 You have to be kidding if you think I was doing it for me!!!! I soooo want Neji to notice meee!!!!!! **But I really don't know if he likes me… Thanks for the encouragement!

**Itachi: **No when I murdered my clan I didn't think they were evil alien squirrels.

**Yami: **-demonically- That wasn't the question Itachi. I think she means in general. -gives Itachi a dark look-

**Itachi:** -gulps and gets slightly scared, but its barely noticeable- Yeah, but I was at a party with a few of my friends when we were twelve…

**Sasuke: ****HOLY CRAP!!! THAT'S WHY YOU THREW A FREAKING CHAR AT ME?!?!?!**

**Itachi: **No, that was just because you pissed me off… As I was saying; We were twelve and went to a party where there was alcohol. A few of my 'friends' and I were betting against who could keep the most rum down without getting ill, and I won. I was freaking wasted -slight smile as he reminisced about being so drunk he didn't know which way was up- Then I went home and started spraying my otouto Sasuke here, with water and ended locking myself in my room for two days, One day because of being drunk and the other because of a hangover. I convinced my naive parents I was sick and they never found out.

**Everyone else: **-Stares- Ooookaay…..

**Kana:** A-ano….. Next letter please….

_Shiro Kage wrote:_

_Dear NinjaKana  
How dare you hurt Itachi! Have better disinplery actions for Yami!  
Questions  
1: Kisame what was your reaction when you first met Itachi?  
2: Orochimaru are you gay, straight or bi?  
3: Gaara I love you! You are awesome! Can you kill Kabuto for me?  
He annoys me._

**Kana: **Hey! Its hard to control her! And….

**Yami:**** Don't say it Kana! **

**Kana: **H-hai….

**Kisame: **Well, I was pretty happy, a little scared cause I didn't know if he was going to kill me, but still pretty happy.

**Kana:**Wow, short and… well really just short….

**Yami: **Kay Orochi-freak-maru?

**Orochimaru:**I resent the freak comment, and anyone who calls me Michel Jackson… What do you think? Kabuto is my slave/bitch, I want Sasuke's body, and when I played strip poker with Tsunade and Jiraiya I didn't pay any attention to Tsunade! Does that answer your question?

**Everyone else -minus Kabuto too-: **o.O o-kay….

**Yami:**** For heavens sake! Just move on!**

**Gaara:** I wish I could! Kana is against violence -rolls eyes-

**Kana:** Well… Kabuto is annoying -taps chin and looks at Gaara's eager to kill face- But I really don't wanna up the rating just because you hurt or kill Kabuto…

**Shikamaru:** Wow… That's pretty lazy…

**Yami:** Next!

_Hiddendemon666 wrote:_

_It's for Itachi and Sasuke. What color are your underpants? and Itachi do you even wear pants underneath that dress, thing? and sakura, why are you such a bitch? if you haven't guessed, yes I hate you. thanks lots. bye bye for now._

**Sasuke:** Um… Is this a serious question? Do I have to answer? -looks to see Kana nodding- Damn…. Well ok, my underpants are black or navy blue.

**Itachi:** Of course I wear underpants! Do you think I'm some sick-o? And its not a dress, it's a cloak. I have 3 pairs of underpants that match my cloak and many more that are plain black. I have no shame, so -shoots Sasuke a glare- there is no reason to hide it. Isnt that right Sasuke?

**Sasuke:**** Don't you dare!**

**Itachi: **Foolish younger brother… -turns to face frontwards- Sasuke used to wet his bed, almost every night. He used to have little white underpants with the Uchiha clan symbol or some cartoon, but he threw them all out after our parents found out.

**Sasuke:**** ITACHI!!!!!!!!!** - struggles against restraints-

**Yami:**** That's enough!** - the Uchiha's stare- Now do I really have to do something about the situation? -Sasuke goes back to trying to break free and harm Itachi- Fine. -Yami easily picks up Sasuke and carries him over into another chair at the opposite side of the room, ties him in and sits on him- I can yell from here to everyone else, or you can behave and stay here while the mature people talk.

**Naruto:**** HAHAHAHAHAHA!! TAKE THAT SASUKE! **-Yami walks over-

**Yami:** Naruto…. -Naruto shuts up- Ok Sakura, answer.

**Sakura:**Ummm…. People to crazy thing when they're in love… -Inner Sakura: **CHA! Try saying that to my face! **-

**Kana:** Next letter…

_Sythin-Reap asked_

_I have alot of questions... like, Itachi, does your name mean 'weasel' only because the japanease translation sounds cool, or does it really mean something? Diedara, how did you get those mouths on your palms, and for that matter, why art with explosives? Sakura... Why are you such a clingy bi/ch?! and Ino too... And lastly, Orochimauru... were you born like that... the way you look?_

**Kana:** I think we're gonna skip the 'bi/ch' question… -looks and Ino and Sakura who are glaring daggers at the letter- heh heh… ano… -runs to calm down Ino and Sakura-

**Itachi:** Holy hell! My name means weasel?!?! Just kidding, I think my parents just like the way the name sounded, I mean, they couldn't have been to bright if I ha killed them that easily, ne?

**Sasuke: ****YOU SICK BASTARD!!!!**

**Kana: **Sas-Sasuke! Calm down!!!! Ano… ano…. Ummm… Just be good and answer this letter and I'll be right back with some tea! -leaves to get tea-

**Deidara:**I dunno… or do I just feel like not answering, hn? I wont ruin it, Shippuden 18 is the newest episode out, and I refuse to tell you, hn. Why are with explosives? Because art is a BANG! hn.

**Orochimaru:** Umm yeah, I was. Have you not seen the pictures of me as a child? What do you think I'm Michel Jackson? -gets very angry- **Huh? Am I f------ Michel Jacson to you?**

**Kana:** -walks in with tea for everyone- What?….

**Yami:**-sees Orochimaru freaking out and dumps really hot tea on him-

**Kana:**Ano… This is getting kinda long, sorry if we didn't answer your questions this chapter. I'll get to them in the next chapter!

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**A/N: More reviews came as I was getting these ones done, so umm… 2 chapter are going to be posted closely to each other. I have only seen to Shippuden 18, because that's all I could get up to in English subbed. Please sent more questions, comments, or anything you can think of! Yes I am getting as lazy as Shikamaru! I've been getting too much sleep!**

**REVIEW PLEASE! (or the next chapter will only be 2 letters long!)**

**Byebyes!!**


	4. Naruto the Bright Dumb Shit

**A/N: YAY! More of Naruto Revealed! There is only 2 letters I was not kidding! (Halfway through 2 people added more questions, THANK YOU!!! But seriously there were only 2 letters before!!)**

**I don't own Naruto, kay? I wish I did but I don't. **

**Oh and One more thing…**

**Yami:**** Damn straight there's one more thing! I just found out I have the same name as some turd in Yu-Gi-Oh! So please help Kana find some other name for me. YES! I SAID PLEASE! So do it!**

**Ok, lets get started;**

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**Kana:**First letter is from… JAROCKI508

_Naruto-why orange_

_Sasuke-why does your hair look like an chicken's ass_

_Sakura-I hate you, weirdo_

_Ino-you are the most beautiful thing I ever seen_

_Shikamaru-want to play go?_

_Chouji-question, when you use that jutsu to make yourself bigger did you know you look like a ball_

_Hinata-Smudged ink_

_Naruto- Smudged ink_

_Kiba-woo, go dogs, This is my dog Max (Max barks)_

_Shino-sprays bug spray on him_

_Neji-it is your destiny to dance!_

_Tenten- panda head!_

_Kakashi-the next book is great_

_Iruka-where did you get that scar_

_Gaara-what ever happened to your teddy_

_Temari-what's with the fan,_

_Kankuro-did you know your puppets were Sasori's_

_Orochimaru-hi MJ_

_Kabuto-stupid medic Nin (kicks his face in)_

_Deidra-do your hands molest you and why do you hurt Tobi_

_Kisame- I'm blue (da ba dee) I'm blue (da ba dee) I'm blue (da ba dee) I'm blue (da ba dee)_

**Naruto:** -mouth full of ramen- Its my favourite color. And it looks cool with my hair! Dattebyo!! And it makes me look **_brighter_** Than Sasuke! Hahaha! Get it?

**Yami:** Well one thing is for sure…. You are officially the dumbest little shit on earth. I would Like to say, Thanks to my pen pal Tayuya for reminding me you can call people 'little shits'.

**Sasuke:** Why do you sound like a dumb-ass? My hair does not look like a chicken's ass, your just jealous because I'm on TV and have more fan girls than you.

**Sakura:** -twitches- That's…… fine…. -Sips calming tea and breaks a table-

**Ino:** I know, aren't I?

**Shikamaru: **Actually, not right now… I'm pretty bored of it, considering barely anyone has asked me anything, so Chouji and I have been playing it most of the time. Kana has been playing too, but she isn't too good… I'm sure she'll improve. Thanks for the offer, but right now it just seems troublesome.

**Chouji:** I know. I kind of have to be like a ball if the rolling is going to work.

**Hinata:** A-ano, Kana-san…. My question is all smudged…

**Kana:** Sorry Hinata… must have happened when I was reading it earlier… trust me it is probable for the better of your sanity. Naruto same for you.

**Naruto:** -Oblivious- Uhh, okay… whatever…

**Kiba:** I know!!! **DOGS RULE!!! DOGS PWN SNAKES!!!!** -throws dog plushie at Orochimaru- **HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!**

**Kana:** Sadly to say, the spray was rigged to go off when the letter was first opened, and I was all by myself in an empty room -scratches arm- and it went off. I had to go to the hospital because, even though it was an eco friendly bug spray, I'm allergic to it… that's why my one arm is bandaged and my other arm is all blotchy.

**Shino:** ………… Jerk, why would you try to kill my bugs?

**Neji:** -twitches- I fell for that already… -points to ankle- damned Kana…. But karma and destiny got her back with the bug spray.

**Tenten:** -tilts head- Huh? Ummm Okay…

**Kakashi:** I've probable read it… I'm getting advanced copies from Jiraiya now…

**Iruka:** On a mission… that's all you need to know.

**Gaara:** None of your business.

**Temari:** Its my weapon… I'm very good at manipulating wind jutus and the fan just made it easier, and a bit more fun.

**Kankuro:** Dude, I had no idea until he told me! Do you think I would have Connected Sasori to the Red Sands that made the puppets? But damn am I pissed at that guy!

**Orochimaru:** You. Suck. -cries-

**Kabuto:** Oh yeah, I'm stupid because I have mastered hundreds of medical jutsus… You are stupid for thinking typing "-_Kicks Kabuto in the face_-" actually makes it so. Pfftt.

**Deidra:** O.o Ummm not to my knowledge… I hurt Tobi, Because I feel like it. Hn.

**Kisame:** You have blue skin too?? -is happy-

**Itachi:** -sigh- Kisame, it's a song…. A song ok.

**Kana: **Next letter is from Sasuke-kun's girl22

_This is a bunch of random questions and statements._

_First statement: Kana please don't add any SasuNaru in here PLEASE. T.T MY Sasuke-kun._

_Question 1: Guy could you please leave? _

_Question 2: -Afraid to ask- Naruto how would you know what Sasuke-kun has time for? -shivers- _

_Second statement: If you don't leave Guy I will kill you. _

_Question 3: Sasuke-kun if you had time for dating who would you date? It has to be a girl!-Please say Rin. Please say Rin. Crosses fingers.- _

_Question 4: Why aren't Kakashi, Kurenai, and Asuma here? _

**Kana: **I don't know if I'll add anything bad… I couldn't do anything bad… I might just have some hugging, and probably nothing related to shonen-ai… Its likely it'll just be the boys making fun of each other in ways people can perceive as shonen-ai. Sorry if I scared you -sweat drop-

**Gai:** No! Lee and I must stay here with our youthfulness!

**Naruto:** Hmm? Oh, I was just kidding around. Trying to get under Sasuke's skin…

**Gai: **Writing does not make it so! That was also quite un-youthful of you!

**Yami:** Just get the hell out…

**Gai:** -walks to the other side of the room-

**Sasuke:** Well, its none of your business… but since your so hopeful, Rin. Happy?

**Kana:** Oh no! Sumimasen! I'll call them right away! Umm but Kakashi was here…

Oh next letter is from Chuint

_Okay, here are my questions. _

_1.) Lee, why Sakura? She isn't good enough for you. I LOVE YOU OMG!1!! -fan girl scream- _

_2.) -cough- Sorry. Anyway, next question is for Lee as well. Why did you look so much like a samurai or whatever when you were younger? It was..weird, you had a dang ponytail at one point! A PONYTAIL! _

_3.) Sakura, why so obsessed with Sasuke? He hates you, Lee doesn't. DO THE DANG MATH AND JUST TAKE WHAT YOU GET! If you don't you will be cold and alone for the rest of your life because no one wants Naruto (other than you-know-who) and Sasuke is just stupid_

_4.) Gaara, do you have anything to say to those people who like to pair you with Lee? What do you think of this pairing? (if you say that you do, so help me Ill so come to your house and... -is attacked by GaaLee fans-)_

_My ending statement? YOSH! -thumbs up-_

**Lee: **Why Sakura you ask? She is a beautiful Lovely Cherry Blossom!! I liked that haircut at that point in time…

**Sakura:**I love Sasuke-kun! If I gave up on Sasuke, then what Kind of girl would I be? Giving up because a few people said too? Hmm?

**Gaara:** Hell yes! -looks around- Kana go away for a minute.

**Kana:** Ok, but no killing… -leaves-

**Gaara:** All you GaaLee fans;

**FUCK. YOU.**

**Kana: **OKAY BACK! Thanks for the letter!

Last one for this chapter is from MidnightWolf

_Question for Itachi: Why did you not kill Sasuke? You could have rid the world of another emo.P.S.Great story! _

**Itachi:** well Sasuke wasn't actually emo until the point where I killed the clan. It is also part of my plan to become stronger.

**Kana:** Thanks: )

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**A/N:**** Sooo… Please tell me If you enjoyed it. Also please, PLEASE help me get a new name for Yami, she will not be quiet about the 'name' until its fixed and I need some sleep… ( I was thinking of maybe having her name be Akuma, Kichiku, or something along thelines of demon/devil/evil/dark in japanese)**

**Also please review and ask your questions!!! **


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